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two’s company, alone is better…

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sometimes you can be there and not really be there. everyone knows those moments. you could be at a crowded party but your brain is alone in a dark room far away. maybe you’re thinking about those recent comments that someone wrote on your social media. maybe you’re thinking: “two hundred more likes, then i’ll know i’m good enough.” you feel like you’re spending your life outside looking in. you’re an outsider by your own making. no one gets you. you spend your days staring out of windows wishing you were outside. you spend your evenings looking into others’ windows wishing you could be them. why can’t people understand? those strangers online, they get you. they know you. and you feel like you know them. they’re your true friends. not those people in your class. not those people who try to call themselves friends. as if. you can’t tell them everything. you can’t tell them your deepest darkest secrets. not like you can him. you’ve never met him. but you know he’s everything you need him to be. he really listens. he really cares. he understands when you’re sad. he knows that your parents are getting you down. he’s so much better than those other boys. you can’t trust other boys. but you can trust him. he tells you not to listen. not to listen when your friends get you down. not to listen when they tell you that you’re crazy for speaking to him. but what do they know? they don’t know him like you do. he’s misunderstood, just like you. he tells you things too. nice things. like how pretty you are. how he loves your eyes. he tells you that you could be a model. he tells you that you’re special. you believe him. you didn’t at first. but he just seems so nice. so genuine. he’s told you that he loves you. you feel the same. it feels so real.

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