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surviving the pretty girls 


everyone has them. that group. those girls. they aren’t liked, they’re feared. you have nothing in common with them, but be honest, you would give your left arm to hang out with them. you know who they are. they walk in packs. they receive the undivided attention of the boys. they always have the best clothes. their skin is perfect. their hair is never out of place. you look at them and think: “why did genetics favour you?” you cannot help but feel happy when bad things happen to them. you would do anything to see one of them get fat, suffer from acne or lose all their hair. instead, they just breeze through life. they hide their insecurities with a mysterious aura of confidence. they know their power. they know their own greatness.

you fear you’ll never be good enough. never be one of them. you wonder what they do together. what they talk about. why don’t they like you? you’re a nice person. you’re fun. you’re smart. but those things don’t matter to the pretty girls. the pretty girls only want other pretty girls to increase their overall appeal. everything about them is cool. they’ve already had sex. they’ve tried drugs. they drink alcohol at the weekend. they smoke in the toilets during recess. you’ve never done any of those things. you’re too frightened to. plus, what would your parents think? how come their parents don’t mind them doing those things?

but here’s the thing. school eventually ends. the real world doesn’t have much patience for silly empty headed girls who rely on their own prettiness. no one remains pretty forever. people get old. so maybe they did have sex before everyone else – but that just makes them easy. and although they do have a constant aura of confidence, they are always the most insecure bunch of people you will ever meet. once you see ‘the other side’ of the pretty girls you realise something important, they are empty shells. without their perfect hair and deep pockets to buy the best clothes – they have very little else going for them. popularity is the only currency they know. without people fearing them, they are lost. take that away and you’re left with the biggest loser you could ever imagine.

the pretty girls are not all bad. once you get one alone, they can be nice. they tend to only form opinions collectively – when left to think for themselves, they can be convinced of other viewpoints. they are just weak minded people. a lack of imagination has left them not wanting to discover anything new for themselves. they only know how to follow, not how to lead. so the best thing to do? just ignore them. keep doing the things that you’re doing. celebrate in your weirdness and individuality. appreciate your friends – the people who know and love you for who you are and not what you look like. they are the people that matter the most in this world.

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